Hold that thought! A vibrational shift

I wanted to share an example of vibrational shift because it’s good practice for me and might help some readers to see how I do it (but you do what works for you).

I’ve noticed a feeling of struggle, daily grind at home. I feel like there’s nothing really exciting for me or the kids to do, but plenty of unwanted tasks that have to get done.

I’m self-aware enough to know that I’ve had this attitude since I was a kid. It’s a great example of creating my reality consistently despite significant changes in my circumstances.

So instead of trying to change my circumstances, let me change how I feel, by changing my vibration.

I like to do this by finding the best-feeling thoughts available to me, and writing them out while I appreciate the feeling:

I love knowing that this is a vibrational game. I love knowing that my inner being adores where I am right now. I love knowing that all my desires are already fulfilled in vibrational reality. I love knowing that I am coming into alignment with that vibrational reality.

That’s all in A-H terms, but you can do the same in religious terms, or simply in basic emotional terms:

I love the feeling of freedom. I love the feeling of appreciation. I love feeling loved and appreciated. I love feeling ease and flow. I love knowing that everything is taken care of. I love knowing that everything is okay. I love knowing that I’m on the right path.

It’s entirely up to you what words or thoughts or ideas are most efficacious.

If I spend ten minutes focusing on these thoughts as I write them out, I feel different and that means I have successfully changed my vibrational focus.

I feel good and I acknowledge that I’m now broadcasting this much better-feeling vibration.

That’s all it takes. If we do that often enough and try to remain in that good-feeling place consistently, then life will be completely different.

The moment you stop the exercise you may find your old vibration reassert itself as you face “reality” again. But it’s actually you switching back to your old vibration that causes the negative feelings to return.

What does it take to stop the old vibration returning? Practice of the new vibration, awareness of when you’ve gone back to the old vibration, and not beating yourself up when that happens.

Just like learning to ride a bike, falling off is an inevitable part of becoming proficient.

Just like learning to play piano or touch-type – mistakes are just part of tuning yourself in to playing or typing perfectly. If you beat yourself up for every mistake you just slow down the learning process. Recognise the mistake and move in the direction you want to go.

Feel better, and when you feel worse just recognise that you’ve let your vibration slide. Write out your really good feeling thoughts and enjoy the feeling of those higher vibrations, with the intent to go deeper and stay longer each time.

For this subject of daily life feeling like a struggle, that tells me what I don’t want, and I can thereby use my exercise to focus in the direction of what I do want. This is called “pivoting”, as you find the opposite of the bad-feeling vibration.

Life is meant to be easy. Life is meant to be effortless. Everything works out for me. There’s no struggle or effort required. Ideas and inspiration spontaneously occur to me. Things just seem to work out. Things just seem to take care of themselves. There’s nothing that needs my urgent attention. There’s nothing that needs me to push or cajole it.

I create my reality. Everything comes together in response to my vibration. Everything is working out according to universal forces. Everything is a match to my vibration.

Life is easy. Life flows without struggle or effort. Life is a downstream ride. I allow things to take care of themselves. I allow things to work themselves out. I allow ease and joy into my experience. I allow love and happiness into my experience. I allow life to surprise and delight me. I allow life to enchant and satisfy me.

It’s a vibrational game!

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Exploring the relationship between wealth and body weight helped me recognise the feelings of insecurity, insufficiency and vulnerability that are helping create my reality.

Wishing I had more wealth or feeling bad about lack of wealth turned out to be self-deceptions that kept me from noticing how I feel at a deeper level.

Living a “marginal” existence reflects my fear of external forces, my desire to withdraw into safety even if that means making do with material insufficiency.

Yet there’s another beautiful paradox at the core of it: because wealth to me means or feels like sufficiency, security, and invulnerability….things I had already regarded as beyond me.

Denying my own sufficiency, security, and invulnerability, I thought it better to treat that awful state as “true” and adapt to it as best I could. Make the most of subjugation and try to limit my exposure to damage and suffering.

I really thought it was true, hence the terror I felt. It is terrifying to be convinced of your own insufficiency, insecurity, and vulnerability in a hostile world, and believe that no one and nothing is coming to save you.

It felt like an improvement to say “that’s just the way it is” and quash any hope it might be different. It seemed like progress to put all the pressure and burden on my own internal efforts to transform myself.

“Grow up”, “this is just life”, but I held onto my spiritual goal, thinking I could somehow transcend the limitations of this ****** existence.

But I was wrong. I was wrong to accept that I am insufficient, insecure, and vulnerable. I was wrong to believe in hostile and cruel external forces. I was wrong to think I am powerless unless I somehow met the requirements of spiritual transformation.

My thoughts create my reality – so I made that my truth, but it doesn’t have to be. I can change my thoughts and change my reality. I can allow sufficiency, security, and invulnerability to be my reality. I can deny the ability of any external force to create my reality. I can accept and allow the power already and always within me.

Real freedom, real security, real sufficiency real invulnerability — I can allow these with my thoughts and begin enjoying them immediately.

My life is my creation, and I can choose what goes in it – thoughts that feel good or thoughts that don’t. It’s entirely up to me. And when I change my thoughts my reality really does change. I feel it, and I see it, and that process of deliberate creation is the most satisfying and delightful thing of all. It’s the meaning and purpose of my existence – freedom, expansion, and joy.

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Are you practicing feeling better/less bad?

It’s very powerful. I continue to have profound insights as I practice feeling better – I even have to remind myself “feel better” rather than digging into these wonderful insights; that’s how enticing they are!

For example, I just had the insight that even my efforts to feel better are coloured by my belief that I am not good enough in myself.

Feeling better is still the answer, but I had an expectation of “and then…” as if feeling better was leading to something transformative.

I call this my “escape” mode, or my “search for answers” mode. It’s a maladaptive attempt to regulate painful emotions by putting all my hopes in a transformative enterprise.

Just feeling better is instead about learning to self-regulate emotions constructively. That’s what feeling good is all about – being able to stay in positive emotions and sustain them.

I rejected that kind of goal in the past because life just seemed too miserable for emotional-regulation to be of value. To my mind that amounted to wilful blindness or self-sedation. It was better to be unhappy and searching.

But now I can see how that conclusion was itself the product of my environment. There were reasons why I felt that awful to begin with. Unfortunately my forays into religion and spirituality convinced me that life was supposed to feel awful, that there was something fundamentally wrong with the human condition.

So as I feel better these beliefs and ideas crop up occasionally, and I just keep on feeling better, appreciating them as they’re let go. As feeling better becomes more reliable and stable, I don’t need these maladaptive thoughts and strategies anymore.

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How to…

Change of pace: I want to share something that is working really well for me.

Is there one thing in your life you reliably and consistently turn to and feel good about? Would you like to extend that good feeling to other aspects of life?

That’s what I’m working on now.

1. Identify something in your life that feels reliably good. Watching series, playing music, drinking a glass of wine after a long day at work, playing sport, whatever works for you.

2. Recognise that when you feel good it’s not the thing making you feel good, it’s how you’re managing your thoughts/vibration.

3. Examine how you’re doing that. When I have a glass of wine in the evening I have an expectation that it will be a relaxing and enjoyable way to unwind. I also have a strong intention that I will enjoy it and not let anything interrupt my enjoyment. Finally, I unconsciously choose thoughts and points of focus that match my intention.

I don’t pour the wine and then get distracted. I don’t pour the wine and think about the worst things that come to mind. I don’t pour the wine and let people interrupt me. I dont pour the wine and start criticising the wine quality.

No, I’ve learned how to enjoy wine-time and it has very clear albeit unconscious parameters.

4. Understand that it’s not the wine that creates this experience, it’s you.

5. Consider your expectations, intentions and choices at other times when you don’t feel so good. Household chores, study or work, certain social interactions…what are your expectations, intentions and choices in those situations?

The fact is that you have the same ability to use your expectations and intentions to steer all your experiences, and the same ability to choose your thoughts and words with care, opting for better feeling ones all the way.

Imagine if you could have that wonderful relaxed and easy feeling all the time…not by drinking wine all the time obviously, but by learning from your good experiences and the powerful skills you unwittingly deploy.

This isn’t about trying to put a “happy face sticker” over your bad feelings. It may not work for you, it may require other elements I’m not fully conscious of. But for me it is a very clear “aha!” moment of knowing full-well that I am already creating my experience in one set of circumstances, and why not extend that creation into others?

Meta-beliefs: is the game of life worth playing?

I’ve spent a lot of time using the Abraham-Hicks teachings to feel better, largely by changing my thoughts.

But much of this work has taken place in the domain of everyday living, or on subjects like money, relationships, health and so on.

If life were a game, these thoughts and subjects would be the contents of the game – all the stuff the players play with.

Yet despite my progress in feeling better about the contents of the game, it turns out I have some strong thoughts or beliefs about the game itself.

At a relatively early age I doubted that the game was worth playing at all. I started to think it was a pointless, meaningless game, where none of the rewards were worth the effort required to attain them.

Nonetheless I felt I had no real choice but to play. Sometimes I was coerced or conscripted into playing, sometimes the pressures of the game forced my hand.

Once you start playing a game, you can’t help but feel invested to some degree, even if your overall attitude to the game is negative.

But it’s impossible to love playing the game while hating the game. It’s impossible to feel truly excited about winning while also thinking that winning is pointless and not worth the effort.

In Abraham-Hicks terms, this is some major vibrational discord.

Changing your meta-beliefs

A lot of the Abraham-Hicks methods are for people who struggle with a subject like money, and it helps them to recognise their conflicting thoughts: I’d love more money vs money doesn’t grow on trees, for example.

If you only have good-feeling thoughts about money you won’t resist or sabotage opportunities. Money will become an easy subject for you.

I haven’t found as much teaching on the meta-subject of life itself or existence itself. I think I’m slightly unusual in having embraced existential pessimism early in life, and ended up living in the shadow of those negative thoughts.

But all the same principles apply! Thinking that life is meaningless, pointless, and not worth the effort, is just another set of thoughts on a subject that can be soothed, softened and shifted gradually.

Life could be worse. This is not the most absurd and painful of all possible worlds. Parts of it are not as bad, some parts are better than others.

And what if “meaning” is not the only thing that gives life value and makes it enjoyable? What if there is more to life than meaning and purpose? What if enjoyment were the point of life?

If my thoughts create my reality, then haven’t I very likely experienced a whole lot of confirmation bias that life is not worth the struggle? Would I like to revisit this old belief just in case my youthful assessment was not as accurate as I thought at the time?

Reconsidering the game

Whether this game of life seems worth playing or not depends on what I think about it. How I feel about life is, in A-H terms, guidance as to the alignment or misalignment of my thoughts about life. Thinking the game is not worth playing feels bad because my inner being does not share that view.

When I know what I don’t want, I implicitly know what I do want. What I don’t want is for life to be a meaningless, pointless game where the rewards aren’t worth the struggle. Therefore what I do want is the opposite of that: I want life to be a meaningful and pointed game where the rewards are more than worth the struggle.

I asked for this many times over, yet instead of staying tuned into that desire I kept turning my attention back to the bleak unwanted perspective that inspired it.

I can change my reality if I change my thoughts, and focus now on what I have desired. I want this game of life to be fun, meaningful, pointed, rewarding, easy and enjoyable.

Life is meant to be fun

My wife told me last night that winning a Nobel Prize extends your lifespan. Assuming the researchers did their homework, that means fame and adulation for one’s life’s work actually helps you live longer.

Good feelings are good. Life is not meant to be grim and miserable, it is meant to be fun and enjoyable. All it takes to let it be fun and enjoyable is to stop focusing on thoughts that feel bad and start focusing on thoughts that feel good.

Gradual improvements

If you persist with this practice, your feelings will gradually change and so will your circumstances. When we focus on thoughts that feel bad, we are drawn to more thoughts and circumstances that match. We unwittingly refuse, resist, and sabotage the good things in life because we’re not willing or practiced at going along with them.

When you focus on thoughts that feel good, thoughts of fun and enjoyment and appreciation, you allow those feelings to gain momentum in your life and open yourself to receive circumstances and conditions that match these good feelings.

Making fun of life

If you can find a feeling of fun in yourself, then you can expect fun to fill your life as well. It just depends on how consistently you can enjoy a feeling of fun without getting thrown off by negative thoughts.

The more frequently you enjoy good feelings, the better your life will feel. You’ll start to see that people who once looked like “victims” of their reality are steadfastly focused on bad-feeling thoughts and circumstances; and the baddest-feeling thought of all is that “I have no control over my circumstances”.

Focusing on fun feelings today is helping me appreciate that I have great potential in this. There’s a lot of fun available to me, and I’m inspired to see how this fun feeling will unfold in my experience, what signs and manifestations will turn up in response to my new point of focus.

Thoughts, Feelings, and Manifestations part 2

The false premise of thinking manifestations are more important than thoughts, leads us to clinging and anxiety and striving for control.

We are in turmoil when we mistake cause and effect. Manifestations are not a cause but an effect. To think our happiness depends on manifestations leaves us confused and chasing our tail.

That’s why struggle and effort feels bad, we are already facing the wrong direction and reading the wrong cues.

So here I am now, learning to feel good about manifestations, or better yet: learning to find alignment in all manifestations.

The multiform manifestations that comprise my reality are a perfect projection of my thoughts in relation to the goodness that God is bestowing on me at all times.

Imagine your reality as a projection of God’s perfect light through you; shaped by your desires and clouded or disturbed by your resistance.

Keep feeling good and finding alignment, and those perturbations will cease and we will find clarity and joy.

Thoughts, feelings, and manifestations

It seems like a long time but it was only a few months ago that I decided to focus on being happy all the time, using the same logic that I discovered in my approach to weight-loss.

That was my “Happiness Challenge” and after a month I moved onto another theme and then another.

Accepting that there’s no final answer, I can appreciate that so many answers have come my way.

Trust, let go, accept, allow, focus, appreciate, feel good, feel less bad, imagine, meditate, rinse and repeat.

I used to think this meant I was going in circles. But it’s natural for things to evolve in stages.

With that in mind I’m inspired today to allow more clarity about my place in this reality and how it all works.

Taking stock

When we think a thought, our emotions tell us how close that thought is to the perspective of our inner being, God.

For example, God loves us. That’s why self-critical thoughts feel bad, because they are not aligned with God’s thoughts about us.

God loves all of us, that’s why you feel bad when you’re critical of others too.

We can take stock of our lives by looking at how we feel, and the manifestations that follow.

If your thoughts are aligned you will feel good and you will notice good-feeling manifestations. If your thoughts are misaligned you will feel bad and notice bad-feeling manifestations.

Creating a new reality

I’m noticing that I don’t have the home I would like for my family.

That’s a manifestation. And while it seems like the manifestation is what causes me to feel bad, that’s not how it works.

How it works is that my thoughts create both my bad feeling and a corresponding manifestation.

There are lots of aspects to homes that complicate this subject, so let’s keep it general and say “I want the perfect home”.

If I focus on the general idea of “my perfect home” I feel good. If I can stop myself focusing on any thoughts that don’t feel good on this subject, just keep it general, then I will continue to feel good, and soon enough I will receive another thought that feels good too.

Keep it clear

This is the only dynamic I need to focus on. My perfect home is a thought that feels good. Keep it general unless more good feeling thoughts become specific.

My perfect home. That feels really good.

There’s no effort needed. Just enjoy how good this thought feels, and the clarity of knowing that this is how creation works.

My perfect home.

Practice enjoying this thought, because it feels so much better than misaligned thoughts. Appreciate the clarity you have in this process, and trust that everything is already unfolding perfectly.

Making “ordinary” beautiful

I’ve had a prejudice against “ordinary” life for years. Now I’m seeing how that prejudice interferes with my own happiness.

It’s based on unhappy childhood memories and compounded by threads of cultural elitism.

Are you bohemian or bourgeois?

I’d had enough of bourgeois life and attitudes and culture, but bohemian lifestyles didn’t offer much hope of lasting happiness, so I continued in my search holding only to a disdain for everything normal, mundane, and predictable.

My main fear was getting “stuck” in a meaningless existence. But nor could I find my own meaning either.

I’m now married with children, and though we aren’t conventional (whatever that means) I’m still dogged by the fear of being happy with a “meaningless” life.

(It’s okay folks, my wife knows this is my own issue to deal with.)

But how stupid is it to be sitting here afraid of being happy with all the good things in life, just because I’m worried I might be embracing something that resembles a very unhappy period of my life?

Say that out loud again….

I’ve never known it with such clarity but there it is: my teenaged, horribly depressed conviction that feeling miserable was a symptom of a bourgeois existence.

Say that out loud: I’m afraid that if I am happy right now I’ll be miserable. 😂

Momentum of old thoughts

Part of me – some old thoughts – still thinks happiness lies in escaping “ordinary” life.

The rest of me knows that there’s no such thing as ordinary life. There’s just my life, and what I do with it is up to me.

Those old thoughts had some momentum and it was like they kept pushing and running without taking the time for an update.

It’s like these different parts of me had never spoken to each other.

But now it’s coming together, through the grace of finding relief and allowing happiness in bit-by-bit.

I’m seeing now that this old fear and need to “escape” was just mistaken. It wasn’t conditions of life I wanted to escape from, it was misaligned thoughts and the bad feelings that followed.

What is “ordinary”?

I’ve said it before, but ordinary really doesn’t matter. If you look at life from the perspective of creating your reality via your thoughts and feelings, allowing God’s blessings to flow to you, then what does ordinary have to do with anything?

It doesn’t matter what other people do or what is popular or commonplace where you live.

What matters is what you think and how your thoughts and perspectives feel to you. Find the thoughts that feel good, and you are finding your own alignment with God, whether that leaves you loving white picket fences or something totally different.

Instantly change your reality

People often come to the Abraham-Hicks teachings because they want their life to get better. And the teachings promise that it will. They promise you can be, do, or have whatever you desire.

But then they point out that you only desire these things because you think you will feel good in the having of them, and it’s up to us to let ourselves feel good right now.

The path to a good-feeling reality is to feel good now; that’s the crux of “believe that you have received it, and it shall be added unto you”.

Proof

It helps to be able to prove to ourselves that this is indeed how it works.

So here’s some proof.

If you close your eyes and forget about who you are, where you are, and anything that needs doing, you will feel immediate relief.

That feeling of relief is proof that you can change how you feel by changing your focus. You instantly changed your reality to an experience of relief.

Not very impressive?

That may not seem like very impressive evidence. No doubt you opened your eyes, immediately remembered who you are, where you are, and what you’re meant to be doing, and the relief vanished.

But that’s just further proof, isn’t it? Bear with me…

Thoughts->feelings->reality

Your thoughts tell a story, and for many of us we’ve ended up telling a s*** story that makes us feel bad.

When you “forget” in meditation you stop focusing on those thoughts and your feelings immediately change.

That’s how easy, simple, and direct it is. Then you focus on your story again and feel bad. Your reality changes.

You need to practice. It took me two years before I was ready to meditate, because I’m a stubborn, intense, incredibly focused person who spent more than half his life digging himself into the deepest hole he could imagine.

I spent these past two years reading books and forums and listening to YouTube videos about the Abraham-Hicks teachings, and learning to find better feeling thoughts, tell a new story, soften my approach to contrast, and find relief no matter what.

Now I can meditate, and meditation is like letting someone lift you gently out of the hole you’ve dug. So that’s two years learning to stop digging before I was ready to let myself be rescued!

Relief is real

If you look out on your world with a mind full of relief, is it still the same reality you see?

If I feel appreciation for my home instead of frustration at it, hasn’t my reality changed?

At first these teachings sound like you can close your eyes, imagine a mansion, and then it will magically appear and you’ll live happily ever after.

But what it’s really like is closing your eyes, forgetting you don’t like your house, and then magically feeling better.

Better-feeling thoughts

Using meditation to forget my old story allows me to instantly inhabit a reality where I feel extremely good.

My old story was fairly intense, so it’ll take some practice to change it. But when I feel better from meditation I naturally gravitate to new story elements that reflect my good feelings.

And then I won’t have to forget my story in order to feel good, because my whole story – and my reality – will be about feeling good deliberately.