Practicing happiness 28

Contra mundum with a vengeance.

So it turns out I’m a villain.

In anime there’s the trope (presumably informed by Shinto beliefs) of a creature or spirit that becomes warped through suffering or injustice or its own negative emotion and becomes evil.

It always struck me as a little unfair, but it makes sense. Like the boar spirit at the beginning of Princess Mononoke, or any number of unhappy yokai in Natsume Yuujinchou. These spirits are often victims themselves, yet their bitterness or wrath turns them into something dangerous to others.

In the Abraham-Hicks teachings the cause of our suffering is our own resistance. When we focus on unwanted aspects of reality we experience friction or going against the flow of our own inner being, because our inner being only ever focuses on the wanted aspects of life.

Our negative emotions are our experience of this friction.

I’ve been working on letting go of resistance and feeling better. But it turns out my resistance was more extreme than I realised.

At some point in my life I got turned around. I took my negative experiences and extrapolated to life in general, the whole world, and existence itself.

I decided that life was not worth living, the world was pointless and broken, and existence was burdensome and futile.

Treating all of existence as unwanted felt pretty bad. But in a way it was a relief to reach that sweeping conclusion. It was more satisfying to turn against life than to try to find redeeming features amidst the misery.

It was also a form of vengeance against everyone and everything responsible for making life so burdensome in the first place. Like playing a game where the odds are stacked against you and the cost always outweighs the rewards, the obvious answer was to refuse to play.

Ironically that’s how I finally interpreted spiritual teachings too. Life is being crushed beneath the wheel of samsara, and it’s only refusing to buy-in that brings us true freedom.

If our thoughts and attitudes create our reality, what kind of reality does this contra mundum attitude create? Not the best.

If resisting the flow of life causes suffering and negative emotion, how about turning defiantly against the stream and saying “f*** you”?

Change of heart

My spiritual search was an attempt to find a way out or transformation of this hated reality. But the answer I have finally arrived at is that my hate is itself the problem.

If I want to feel better I have to learn to love the reality I’m in. If I love the reality I’m creating, then it will change to reflect this positive and satisfying and delightful attitude.

I can’t hate my way into a better-feeling life. No matter how justified my resentment might seem, or how comforting my scorn might feel, if I’d rather enjoy life then it’s time for them to go.

5 thoughts on “Practicing happiness 28

  1. The living water of the bible
    Available to all when CONVICTED of their one individual karmic guilt
    And repent and receive the holy spirit
    ..her wisdom teaches all things to those who seek
    THE NARROW GATE PROPERLY
    THEN THEIR SINS EILL BE HID IN THE CHRIST
    AND THEY GROW FROM THE RENEWED HEART TO THE FULLY MATURED RENEWED MIND
    A DANGER THAT CAN TAKE ONE OFF THE PATH

    A DANGER CAN COME
    in the form of a seduction, an amusement, a diversion, an indulgence that is eating away at the fiber of your secure little world.
    You are too cocksure.
    You underestimate the tribute this dalliance will demand.

  2. John 4

    7There cometh a woman of Samaria to draw water: Jesus saith to her, Give me to drink. 8(For his disciples had gone to the city to buy provisions.) 9Then saith the woman of Samaria to him, How is it that thou, being a Jew, askest drink of me, who am a woman of Samaria? for the Jews have no dealings with the Samaritans. 10Jesus answered and said to her, If thou knewest the gift of God, and who it is that saith to thee, Give me to drink; thou wouldst have asked him, and he would have given thee living water. 11The woman saith to him, Sir, thou hast nothing to draw with, and the well is deep: from whence then hast thou that living water? 12Art thou greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well, and drank of it himself, and his children, and his cattle? 13Jesus answered and said to her, Whoever drinketh of this water, shall thirst again: 14But whoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him, shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him, shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life.

    15The woman saith to him, Sir, give me this water, that I may not thirst, neither come hither to draw. 16Jesus saith to her, Go, call thy husband, and come hither. 17The woman answered and said, I have no husband. Jesus said to her, Thou hast well said, I have no husband: 18For thou hast had five husbands, and he whom thou now hast, is not thy husband: in that thou hast spoken truth. 19The woman saith to him, Sir, I perceive that thou art a prophet. 20Our fathers worshiped in this mountain; and ye say, that in Jerusalem is the place where men ought to worship. 21Jesus saith to her, Woman, believe me, the hour cometh, when ye shall neither in this mountain, nor yet at Jerusalem, worship the Father. 22Ye worship ye know not what: we know what we worship, for salvation is from the Jews. 23But the hour cometh, and now is, when the true worshipers shall worship the Father in spirit and in truth: for the Father seeketh such to worship him. 24God is a Spirit: and they that worship him, must worship him in spirit and in truth. 25The woman saith to him, I know that Messiah cometh, who is called Christ; when he is come, he will tell us all things. 26Jesus saith to her, I that speak to thee am he.

    HUSBAND..SYMBOLICALLY…. THE CONSCIOUS MIND
    ..NOT WANTING TO ADMIT HOW ONE CHANGES THEIR CONSCIOUS FOCUS
    OR what is REQUIRED TO HAVE ONE PSSS THRU THE NARROW GATE

  3. Luke 13
    The Parable of the Leaven

    (Judges 20:18-23; 2 Samuel 2:12-32; 2 Chronicles 13:4-19; Matthew 13:33-33)

    20And again he said, To what shall I liken the kingdom of God? 21It is like leaven, which a woman took and hid in three measures of meal, till the whole was leavened.

    The Narrow Gate

    (Matthew 7:13-14)

    22And he went through the cities and villages, teaching, and journeying towards Jerusalem. 23Then said one to him, Lord, are there few that are saved? And he said to them, 24Strive to enter in at the strait gate: for many, I say to you, will seek to enter in, and shall not be able. 25When once the master of the house hath risen, and hath shut the door, and ye begin to stand without, and to knock at the door, saying, Lord, Lord, open to us; and he will answer and say to you, I know you not whence ye are: 26Then ye will begin to say, We have eaten and drank in thy presence, and thou hast taught in our streets. 27But he will say, I tell you, I know you not whence ye are: depart from me, all ye workers of iniquity. 28There shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth when ye shall see Abraham, and Isaac, and Jacob, and all the prophets in the kingdom of God, and you yourselves excluded. 29And they will come from the east, and from the west, and from the north, and from the south, and will sit down in the kingdom of God. 30And behold, there are last, who shall be first; and there are first who shall be last.

    ECCL 3

    The Excellence in God’s Works

    9What profit hath he that worketh in that in which he laboreth? 10I have seen the labor, which God hath given to the sons of men to be exercised in it.

    11He hath made every thing beautiful in its time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end.

    12I know that there is no good in them, but for a man to rejoice, and to do good in his life. 13And also that every man should eat and drink, and enjoy the good of all his labor, it is the gift of God. 14I know that, whatever God doeth, it shall be for ever: nothing can be added to it, nor any thing taken from it: and God doeth it, that men should fear before him. 15That which hath been is now; and that which is to be hath already been; and God requireth that which is past.

  4. TO KINDA SUM IT UP
    Benson Commentary
    Ecclesiastes 7:14. In the day of prosperity be joyful — Enjoy God’s favours with thankfulness. In the day of adversity consider — Namely, God’s work, that it is his hand, and therefore submit to it: consider also why he sends it: for what sins, and with what design? God also hath set the one against the other — Hath wisely ordained, that prosperity and adversity should succeed one another; that man should find nothing after him — Or, rather, after it, as it may be rendered; that is, after his present condition, whether it be prosperous or afflictive: that no man might be able to foresee what shall befall him afterward; and therefore might live in a constant dependance upon God, and neither despair in trouble, nor be secure or presumptuous in prosperity

  5. He hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end.

    To what shall I liken the kingdom of God? 21It is like leaven, which a woman took and hid in three measures of meal, till the whole was leavened.

    HEART AS SUBCONSCIOUS/FEMININE
    NO MAN CAN FIND OUT HOW GOD WILL EVENTUALLY MAKE ALL PERFECT IN HIS TIME. MAN AS THE VAIN CONSCIOUS MIND OF HUMAN SOULS WHO ALL HAVE DARKENED HEARTS.

    DESPITE THIS GOD HAS MIXED INTO THE THREE MEASURES OF EACH HEART THE CORRECTING LEAVEN OF GOD..SO THAT EVENTUALLY..THE CORRUPTING LEAVEN OF SIN WILL BE ERADICATED BY THE LEAVEN OF THE GOSPEL
    BY WAY OF PROPER REPENTANCE AND RECEIVING THE HOLY SPIRIT AND THE RENEWED HEART THST ENABLES ONE TO MATURE AND HAVE A RENEWED MIND

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