Practicing happiness 24

“If you are disallowing happiness you are disallowing everything you believe will make you happy.” – Abraham-Hicks

Even if you know that core beliefs based on childhood experiences are the root of your problems, still it’s not a good idea to make your work about digging them all up.

Rather, if your work is just intending to feel better those core beliefs will come up when you are ready to face them, and you’ll only face those which are actual obstacles to better feeling.

As you intend feeling better you’ll probably notice it working immediately, but after some time and distractions you’ll find yourself feeling bad again, or bored, or in some situation you don’t like.

This is contrast coming up to help you let go of your resistance. All you have to do is intend to feel better in the midst of whatever you are experiencing, and trust that this approach is enough.

It probably won’t seem like enough, but that’s just resistance making you impatient or feeling like you need “more” to really change your life.

But all of that – impatience, boredom, frustration, yearning for change – will eventually be shown to originate in your deepest resistance and loss of alignment.

Alignment is satisfaction, security, and sufficiency. It won’t be immediately apparent but by accepting the intent to feel better as enough for you moment by moment, you are retraining yourself to allow satisfaction, security and sufficiency into your experience.

That’s what the quote at the beginning of this post is all about. If you aren’t happy and you’re finding fault in your experience of life, it’s all because you are disallowing happiness, possibly at a very deep level or from a very early point in your beliefs.

That doesn’t mean you need to go find those beliefs and change them. If you haven’t practiced feeling better you won’t be able to change them. You need to strengthen the attitude of feeling better and letting it be enough, and that itself will become the foundation of your new beliefs.

2 thoughts on “Practicing happiness 24

  1. You don’t *need* to examine those beliefs that disallow happiness, but that doesn’t mean you *shouldn’t*, especially if doing so might pay off big time and make happiness more accessible. Maybe I’m reading it wrong, but while I do agree with your ‘practice makes perfect’ approach to happiness, I would add that research has shown that *deliberate* practice quickens expertise in many fields.

    • My experience has been that after many years of examining and changing those core beliefs I was very good at doing that, but showed no signs of reaching the end.

      That doesn’t add up. There should be only a finite number of core beliefs to change. But my “problem solving” attitude was itself framed and informed by core beliefs…so the practice of “trying to change core beliefs” was simultaneously reinforcing core beliefs.

      In hindsight I can see that I wasn’t going deep enough. But I only know that because I stopped trying and focused on feeling better.

      We might have very different frameworks and core belief dynamics going on so my experience may not be relevant to you. Yet it seems a sure approach to focus on feeling better (deliberately) and letting that be the practice I grow stronger at.

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