Today I’ve been learning to trust, and the first lesson is that I can’t trust while grasping for inner certitude.
I’ve often wondered about the line “the son of man has nowhere to lay his head” but right now I think it relates to trust.
For years I sought to understand, but my understanding was about remaining in control. If you know the rules you can avoid mistakes!
But now the rule is to trust without knowing exactly what is going to happen, yet knowing that it will all be for my happiness.
I’d heard before the proverb: “trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding”, but back then I still needed to understand how to do that.
Not any more. I don’t even know if I’m doing it right, so I have to trust even there. The whole thing feels very wobbly right now, so I have to trust that I’m on the right track.
That’s the best I can put it for now: how do I know I’m on the right track? Because I have to trust that I am!